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When someone scrolls through Val’s Instagram page, they can see a recent camping trip she took with friends, a batch of homemade chicken nuggets and a few of her favorite memes.
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But what they can’t see: Val, 22, got engaged nine months ago to her boyfriend of two years.

She never made a post about the proposal — and she doesn’t plan to.

“We are happy and content as we are, living our lives together privately … no outsiders peering in through the windows, so to speak,” said Val, who lives with her fiance in San Marcos, Texas, and asked CNN not to use her last name for privacy reasons.
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Val is one of a growing number of young adults from Generation Z, the cohort from age 28 down to teenagers, who are opting for “quiet relationships,” in which their love lives — the good and the bad —remain offline and out of view from a larger audience of friends and family.
It’s a new turn back to the old way of doing things: date nights without selfies, small weddings without public photo galleries and conflict without a procession of passive-aggressive posts. On platforms such as TikTok, creators declaring this preference for “quiet” or “private” relationships rake in thousands of views, and on Pinterest, searches for “city hall elopement” surged over 190% from 2023 to 2024.

If your prefrontal cortex developed before the iPhone came along, you may be rolling your eyes. But for a generation raised on social media, rejecting the pressure to post is a novel development — and one that experts say could redefine the future of intimacy.

How social media killed romance
Gen Z’s turn toward privacy partly stems from a growing discomfort with how social media shapes — and distorts — romantic relationships, said Rae Weiss, a Gen Z dating coach studying for her master’s degree in psychology at Columbia University in New York City.

A couple that appears to be #relationshipgoals may flaunt their luxury vacations together, picture-perfect date nights, matching outfits and grand romantic gestures. But Gen Z has been online long enough to know it’s all just a carefully curated ruse.

“It’s no longer a secret that on social media, you’re only posting the best moments of your life, the best angles, the best pictures, the filters,” Weiss said. “Young people are becoming more aware that it can create some level of dissonance and insecurity when your relationship doesn’t look like that all the time.”

Indeed, there are messy, complicated and outright mundane moments to every relationship — but those aren’t algorithmically climbing the ranks (unless the tea is piping hot, of course). This can lead some to equate the value of their relationships with how “Instagrammable” they are, Weiss said.

Frequently broadcasting your relationship on social media has even been linked to lower levels of overall satisfaction and an anxious attachment style between partners, according to a 2023 study.

Embracing private relationships, then, is partly Gen Z’s way of rejecting the suffocating pressures of perfection and returning to the value of real-life displays of affection.

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Ruby Williams’ birthday was not your average 18th. She celebrated it on the Klamath River, with a group of young people making a historic journey paddling from the river’s headwaters in southern Oregon to its mouth in the Pacific Ocean, just south of Crescent City, California. It marked the first time in a century that the descent has been possible, after the recent removal of four dams allowed the river to flow freely.
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Williams, together with fellow paddler Keeya Wiki, 17, spoke to CNN on day 15 of their month-long journey, which they are due to complete on Friday. At this point, they had just 141 miles (227 kilometers) of the 310-mile (499 kilometer) journey left to go and had already passed through some of the most challenging rapids, such as those at the “Big Bend” and “Hell’s Corner” sections of the river.
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Both were exhausted and hadn’t showered in days — although they promised they “aren’t completely feral.” However, despite tired minds, they were steadfast in their commitment.
“We are reclaiming our river, reclaiming our sport,” said Williams.

“We are getting justice,” Wiki, who is from the Yurok Tribe, added. “And making sure that my people and all the people on the Klamath River can live how we’re supposed to.”

The Klamath River runs deep in the cultures of the native peoples living in its basin, who historically used dugout canoes to travel along it. They view it as a living person, a relative, who they can depend on — and in turn protect.

“It’s our greatest teacher, our family member,” said Williams, who is from the Karuk Tribe, which occupies lands along the middle course of the Klamath. “We revolve ceremonies around it, like when the salmon start running (the annual migration from the sea back to freshwater rivers to spawn), we know it’s time to start a family.”

Historically, it was also a lifeline, providing them with an abundance of fish. The Klamath was once the third-largest salmon-producing river on the West Coast of the US. But between 1918 and 1966, electric utility company California Oregon Power Company (which later became PacifiCorp), built a series of hydroelectric dams along the river’s course, which cut off the upstream pathway for migrating salmon, and the tribes lost this cultural and commercial resource.
For decades, native people — such as the Karuk and Yurok tribes — demanded the removal of the dams and restoration of the river. But it was only in 2002, after low water levels caused a disease outbreak that killed more than 30,000 fish, that momentum really started to build for their cause.

Twenty years later, the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission finally approved a plan to remove four dams on the lower Klamath River. This was when Paddle Tribal Waters was set up by the global organization Rios to Rivers to reconnect native children to the ancient river. Believing that native peoples ought to be the first to descend the newly restored river, the program started by teaching local kids from the basin how to paddle in whitewater. Wiki and Williams were among them — neither had kayaked before then.

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